Did you know a difference of opinion is not a personal attack? I was thirty years old before I knew this, and only in the last year have I really understood it. I used to get so irate when others disagreed with me. I found myself getting into arguments quite often online and off. Why? because when someone disagreed with me it felt like a personal attack.
It is ok for others to feel differently about something than you do. It’s called an opinion. It is ok for others to have a different opinion than you do. We all know this, so why would a difference of opinion feel like a personal attack? Insecurity in your own opinion leads to fear at other’s opinions. When other people agree with you, it makes you feel more secure and less shaky about your own opinion. When you feel insecure you need other’s opinion to reinforce or stabilize your beliefs. When someone disagrees with you, it makes you feel even shakier and insecure about your beliefs. That is why a difference of opinion can feel like a personal attack.
Understand that your feelings are as valid as anybody else’s. It might be helpful to even repeat this to yourself when you find yourself getting upset at someone else’s opinion.
This blog entry written by Trula. Thanks for visiting Seed & Flame!
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- I'm Trula aka Mercury Lynch and this is my writing blog. I write essays, short stories, poetry, and books, publish a magazine, and own a small used bookstore. Yes, I live in words. Seed & Flame is part of the MSPmedia network ©2006-2009 All Rights Reserved
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